I am a resident of india and have been a part of both worlds in india- one thats traditional and other thats modern. People in small cities are very narrow minded and live in relationship for them is mere reason for having sex. I have seen cases where parents preferred to marry their girls to complete strangers than allowing them to meet a person, know them and then decide. Some of them are lucky others suffer domestic violence in terms of mental, physical torture. In our society, sex is still considered a desperate talk. Parents feel awkward to talk about it but thanks to internet, children do not need it anymore.
Coming to live in relationships in india. We wanted to spend a weekend together and ended up taking favor from a friend to spend the night in his house. Why I entered live in relationship because hotels were asked by the police to stop giving rooms to people who didn't have marriage certificate. For those who do not know, India still has a moral police which guards the rights of religious bodies and every year carries posters on valentines day marking it as anti social anti religious day. So its easy to imagine their thoughts on live-in or lesbian or gays. Problems faced by live in couples are:
To move in there should be a house and the general advertisement for lending house says its for family or bachelors. As soon as they see us, their answer is no. At first they will ask if you are married,in case you think you will lie and get the house its not that easy, then they take your parents number, their address, your employer's number and make it sure that they do call them to confirm if you are married or not.
Secondly, no family talks to you. They consider you sinners or extremely arrogant people( even if you look innocent like me) and guilty of breaking society rules. The kids are not allowed to talk to you especially teenagers who could run under our bad influence.
For girls who have been in live in relationship, no guy wants to date them or marry them. They mark them as used or second hand. For men, no problem they can easily get a girl in their community . For muslim girls its even more difficult as they have a virgin test on the first night of their marriage. We have various castes, communities and every parent wants their children to marry a person with same education, family background as theirs.
Everything has to be a secret. If my parents visit, he has to go somewhere else for those days and if his parents visit, i have to go to my parents house. We can't tell our parents, they will never understand and so keep on lying to them. All they want from us is to get married and have kids. A single hint and we will be humiliated by them and they will never respect the girl. Obviously the guy again has a lenient escape.
In your friend circle, you become a piece of mock or gossip. None of them is going to understand and they are no more modern than our parents.
So at the end we two are on our own and kinda isolated from society, family and friends.
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LIVE-IN still Immoral in India |
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Comments
| | | | | I was suprised to know there is this problem in India, i thought India was a more liberal. Especially about the moral police. Do you really have it? We have it in my country, but they are mainly busy with prostitution, chasing men/women companies at night clubs and restaurants. |
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| | | | | | Traditional societies, like in India, are hard to change in terms of habits, customs and people's views. Political system is easier to change. You can abolish sexual-based persecution of homosexuals by changing laws, but you cannot change what people think. Not overnight at least. |
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